I have long had a problem finishing things. I am not sure when the pattern began but it’s been around at least since high school. And when I say not finishing things, I don’t mean I start things then peter out in the middle, though that happens too. The pattern usually looks like me not finishing, for a variety of reasons, just inches away from the finish line. If I ran a 5k , I wouldn’t be totally surprised if I got diverted at 4.9k. Like meh.. I tried it and decided this running thing is not for me, so why finish? Or dang, my shoe lace broke… oh well, I guess I won’t finish then. Ha! So, I guess I am not totally shocked that 3 days from my 100 day challenge finish line I simply FORGOT to write a blog yesterday. I mean… wtf? On the heels of my computer deleting my blog from the day before, causing me to have to completely start over, it seems my old familiar pattern of stopping just before I actually complete something is attempting to take over. Well, not today buddy. NOT today. I will complete #98 AND #99 today. So there!
In a way, I am glad this happened. The habit of not finishing things is a serious problem in my life. Talk about a major block to getting ahead and productivity in general! Since I am 100% committed to next leveling the shit out of my life this year, I welcome the opportunity to lay a new neural pathway for my brain. A path called, “I am a finisher.” The neural pathways that create the outward expressions of who we are, are NOT fixed. The only reason the road of not finishing things was so well worn is because I kept walking down it. Every time I don’t finish something, that particular neural synapse, and all its accompanying outward behaviors, gets strengthened. In that same line of thinking, all I need to do to become a finisher is to just stop walking that old familiar path. To finish what I start even if it seems inconsequential. For example, one of the ways this “not finishing” thing manifests itself is something seemingly meaningless and downright silly. I often will stop eating when there is just one bite left, even if I am not full. Or, I will often stop using a product, like face lotion, just one or two applications shy of using the whole bottle. Funny, huh?
It may seem small, but looking at my bathroom cabinet with a bunch of almost empty bottles filling the space is such a perfect reflection of my life. I have at least 3 projects that are like this. Things that are really REALLY close to being done, but sit there instead… Things like adapting my teacher training manual as a stand alone “how to teach hoop dance” book or completing my clothing line with a couple tops waiting to be produced. Or even, finishing the super simple blog website as the home for my blogging. And then, on the other hand I stress and worry about money and purpose and if I am on the right road. Well, sheesh. If this one pathway of not finishing can be boarded up and allowed to go to seed, with my new path of FINISHING being made wider everyday, many of the things I stress about on a daily basis will naturally right themselves. Thank goodness!
As always, we are all in this together!